We took the kids to Burger King today because this one has a large, indoor, climate controlled playground... Apparently, we got there just in time for the big fight... One boy, one girl - both were pushing, pointing, yelling loudly, calling each other names like "retard" and "ugly"... It happened right at the doorway from the eating area to the play area, so everyone in the entire store was watching and frowning, looking to see if someone would break it up... When they finally moved away from each other, the boy actually went up to the counter and tried to get the manager to kick the girl and her family out of the Burger King... Someone even called the police in case things got further out of hand...

Luckily, after several minutes (and just before the police arrived), the combatants gathered up their respective kids, got into their cars, and left... Yes - these were parents, grown adults... How do they expect their kids to learn to play well with others if apparently they never did?

"It's a terminological inexactitude" - Alexander Haig in a television news interview...

David Bradley is the inventor of the most famous (infamous?) keystroke combination in all of history: CTRL + ALT + DELETE... Used by millions since the dawn of the personal computer to restart locked computers, close rogue programs, and other functions, the code was actually written in about five minutes! Bradley joined IBM in June 1975 as an engineer in Boca Raton, Florida... By 1980, he was one of 12 working to create the IBM PC, and knew they needed a simple way to restart the computer if it failed, so he wrote the code... "I didn't know it was going to be a cultural icon," Bradley said. "I did a lot of other things than Ctrl+Alt+Delete, but I'm famous for that one."

At a 20-year celebration for the IBM PC, Bradley was on a panel with Microsoft founder Bill Gates and other tech icons when the discussion turned to the key combination... "I may have invented it, but Bill made it famous," Bradley said... (Bill Gates did not laugh) So famous, his name was once mentioned as a clue in the final round of the TV game show "Jeopardy!"

Now the 55 year old Bradley is retiring (tomorrow) after over 28 years with IBM... He will continue teaching at North Carolina State University after retirement... "After having been the answer on final 'Jeopardy,' if I can be a clue in 'The New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle, I will have met all my life's goals," Bradley said....

The AP had this on the wire from New London, Connecticut, this morning: A spark from a defibrillator set a woman's clothing on fire when a paramedic tried to restart her heart in an ambulance... Brenda Jewett, 47, was pronounced dead at a hospital Monday... Neither the paramedic nor other members of the ambulance crew were injured by the fire...

"I've been in this business 20 years and I've never heard of something like this," said Leonard Guercia Jr., the state's EMS director. Mary Newman of the National Center for Early Defibrillation in Pittsburgh said she doubted the fire or the defibrillator caused Jewett's death.

"When you defibrillate a person, they are already dead," she said.

Here are some lessons leaned from the experiences of a number of would-be bank robbers.

Pick The Right Bank:
You don't want to make the same mistake as the fellow in Anaheim, CA, who tried to hold up a bank that was no longer in business and had no money.

Study Your History:
Don't try to stick up the First National Bank of Northfield, Minnesota. Jesse James tried it 111 years ago, and the townsfolk took just seven minutes to kill two and capture three of his gang. Nobody tried again until 1984, and the customers chased the guy down. They're tight with their dollar, those Minnesotans.

Speak To The Right Teller:
One robber in Upland, CA, presented his note to the teller, and her father, who was in the next line, got all bent out of shape about it. He wrestled the guy to the ground and sat on him until authorities arrived.

Don't Sign Your Demand Note:
Demand notes have been written on the back of a subpoena issued in the name of a bank robber in Pittsburgh . . . on an envelope bearing the name and address of another in Detroit. And in East Hartford, Connecticut, on the back of a withdrawal slip giving the robber's signature and account number.

Go Easy On The Disguise:
One robber, dressed up as a woman with very heavy make-up, ran face first into a glass door. He was the first criminal ever to be positively identified by lip-print.

Take Right Turns Only:
Avoid the sad fate of the thieves in Florida who took a wrong turn into the Homestead Air Force Base, drove up to a military police guardhouse and, thinking it was a tollbooth, offered the security police money.

Be Aware Of The Time:
Imagine the chagrin of the bank robber in Cheshire, Massachusetts, who hit the bank at 4:30 PM, then tried to escape through downtown North Adams, where he was trapped in rush hour traffic until police arrived.

Consider Another Line Of Work:
Bank robbery is not for everyone. One nervous Newport, RI robber, while trying to stuff his ill-gotten gains into his shirt pocket, shot himself in the head and died instantly.

Be Strong:
Then there was the case of the hopeful criminal in Swansea, Massachusetts, who, when the teller told him she had no money, fainted. He was still unconscious when the police arrived. His getaway car parked nearby had the keys locked inside.

Here are some good pieces of advice from the cattle range

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman . . . neither works.

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

8. There are three kinds of men:

* The few who learn by reading.
* The few who learn by observation.
* The majority of them who have to touch the electric fence to see if it's really on.

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10. If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

11. Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.

12. Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.

13. If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

14. It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

15. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.

16. Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.

17. Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.

18. When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be suprised if they learn their lesson.

19. When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

20. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

Try this one !!!

While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor
and make clockwise circles. Now, while doing this, draw the
number "6" in the air with your right hand.

Your foot will change direction and there's nothing you can do
about it!

"Holy Smokes!" exclaimed one Nasa Engineer! Not only has Opportunity, the second of two Mars Exploration Rovers landed successfully on Mars (yesterday), but it has send back its first pictures - pictures of a landscape unlike any previously seen on any Mars mission! In what is now being called "and interplanetary hole in one" by some scientists, Opportunity not only landed on target, it actually landed inside a shallow impact crater... In the best of all possible scenarios, the rocks and soil samples scientists most wanted to study are now mere inches below the rover's tires! Plus, there is an exposed rock outcropping a short jaunt away... Needless to say, if you weren't excited by the possibilities when Spirit landed, then you ought to be now with Opportunity...

On a related note, the engineers have determined that the issue that plagued Spirit last week is a software issue - apparently the file system subroutines were causing issues in the onboard flash memory... Luckily, if it's software, it can be reprogrammed from here! (Let's see Microsoft, Dell or Gateway try that!) It may take a couple of weeks, but the prognosis is good to get Spirit once again roving around Mars!

So check the Mars Exploration Rover Mission web site often - with two rovers (one on each side of the planet) there is practically a 24-7 stream of new and interesting data and pictures arriving from Mars! One can only hope the scientists and engineers at Nasa find some time to sleep...

When you look back at your childhood years, there are some TV shows that really stand out... More than likely (if you are like me), the ones that stand out the most are semi-educational (edutainment by today's terminology) or were PBS shows that not only entertained but really connected with kids... Now, not only are the shows gone and off the air (or just showing reruns or altered formats), but the people who made them what they were are passing on as well...

Last year it was Fred Rogers of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood and John Ritter of Clifford - the Big Red Dog (which used to be one of my Sons' favorites before they switched to the "childhood years" after Ritter died)... This year starts with the death (yesterday) of Bob Keeshan - TV's Captain Kangaroo... TV for kids just isn't the same without these types of shows... And the shows just would not have been the same - would not have been as great as they were - without people like these...

( sigh )

It happened 20 years ago today - Apple introduced the first Macintosh computer! In many ways, it was to operating systems what the PC was to computers: The start of something that would change the world forever... The Personal Computer (PC) had been around for several years, but was still far too complicated for most people to use easily... With the Macintosh, Apple introduced a simple icon-base user interface and (believe it or not) the mouse - the first time these two things were part of a computer generally available to the public... In fact, many newspaper stories at the time had to include a definition! The The San Jose Mercury News, for example, described the mouse as "a handheld device that, when slid across a table top, moves the cursor on the Mac's screen."

And it went from there - The Macintosh was the first platform to introduce many of the user interface and operating system features which we now take for granted... And much like the PC, once people saw that it could be done, and that people liked it, everyone started doing it...

So why is the company still stuck with, as Bill Howard from PC Magazine wrote in a column last August, a "market share three points away from being a rounding error"? There may be many reasons: the computers are more expensive than PCs, the performance has not matched PCs for many years, Apple refusal to let other manufacturers use the OS, etc... Regardless, this is one case where the tail wags the dog - almost all of the things Apple has pioneered to make using the computer easier has made its way into PCs everywhere...

So happy birthday Mac!

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself andfor the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.


When I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, Iwas told the keys had been locked n it. I went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got
that side."

It's about time more conservatives spoke up about this!!
Its time to take a serious look at our involvement there.
Every day there are news reports about more deaths. Every night on the TV are photos of death and destruction. Why are we still there?
The land is too large to secure all of it. The bad people causing this damage can roam anywhere, and we can't possibly police the whole place. Why are we still there?
We occupied this land, which we had to take by force, but it causes us nothing but trouble. Why are we still there?
Their government is unstable, and in the process of changing. Why are we still there?
Refugees are fleeing by the thousands, driven from their homes. Why are we still there?
It will cost billions to rebuild, which we can't afford. Why are we still there?
There are more than 1000 religious sects.
We can't even secure the borders. Why are we still there?
And to repeat: Every day we hear of more Americans killed in this dangerous land.


It's clear! We must abandon California!

Have you seen the commercials with the "Sprint Girl," the almost annoyingly cheerful blond telling everyone about Sprint wireless service, long distance, and DSL? While apparently quite happy to pitch for Sprint, she apparently still has to work two jobs: Lately she's been showing up Bob Evans commercials as a waitress...

Here's a web site you've got to see.........

http://www.lares.dti.ne.jp/~yugo/storage/monocrafts_ver3/03/index.html

The Department of Transportation (DOT) is "actively working" (you know how these things are) on expanding the main East-West near our house from its current 2 lanes to 6 lanes... Now, this has its own problems (traffic, traffic, traffic) and its own humor value (how many times do you figure they can dig that up?)...

Lately, we've been watching as they put the curbs in - cement curbs about a foot-and-a-half above the current level of the dirt where the road will eventually be... That's right: no road, no rocks, no nothing - just flattened dirt and curbs 18 inches up... (Why? Who knows)...

The fun part is it rained today... So it was good to see that the basic layout of the road for drainage is sound - the water all ran towards the sewer grates... It was bad to see the water then form very large puddles (or small lakes) below the sewer grates, as those grates are part of the curbs, and therefore several inches above the current water line... Ah well - I wonder how long this will set them back?

So - your friend, neighbor, spouse, significant other, etc is an Internet junkie? Now you can get them a gift that shows them how much to care, yet also lets them show their inner geek to the world... Check out the Google Store at http://www.googlestore.com! Everything from ties, shirts, hats, watches, lava lamps, and goo (really, go look!)... My favorites? The Google Blinky Pin and the Black is Back "I'm Feeling Lucky" T-shirt... Visit today!

Remember the count down along Alligator Alley .... 95 .... 94 ..... 93 .....
Be glad you weren't traveling on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.
Then it would have gone:
95.9 ... 95.8 ... 95.7 ... 95.6 ... 95.5 ... 95.4 .....

# Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
# Nice parachute. Never opened. Used once.
# Nordic Track $300. Hardly used. Call Chubby.
# Open house: Body shapers toning salon. Free coffee and doughnuts.
# Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
# Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
# Snowblower for sale. Only used on snowy days.
# Stock up and save. Limit one.
# Vacation Special: Have your home exterminated.
# Wanted: Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
# And now, the Superstore — unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
# Christmas tag-sale: Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
# Dog for sale: Eats anything and is fond of children.
# Georgia Peaches, California grown.
# For Sale by owner: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica 45 Volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last month. Wife knows everything.

The Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch, M-LAW, has finished the Wacky Warning Label Contest, now in it's seventh year! The winning labels were selected from a list of M-LAW's finalists by listeners of the Dick Purtan show on Detroit radio station, WOMC-FM 104.3...

• The $500 grand prize for the wackiest label was awarded to Robert Brocone of Euclid, Ohio for a warning he found on a bottle of drain cleaner which says: "If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product."
• Second place went to Alexander Tabarrok of Fairfax, Virginia for a label on a snow sled which says: "Beware: sled may develop high speed under certain snow conditions."
• Third place went to Bob Skowronek of Northville, Michigan who purchased a 12-inch-high storage rack for compact disks which warns: "Do not use as a ladder."
• Fourth place went to Melissa Cerrito of Atlantic Mine, Michigan for a five-inch fishing lure which sports three steel hooks and cautions users that it is, "Harmful if swallowed,"
• Fifth place goes to a smoke detector which warns: "Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire," sent in by Bill Masterson, Ft. Myers, Florida.

The contest is conducted yearly to reveal how lawsuits, and fear of lawsuits, have prompted many manufacturers to issue warnings against even obvious misuses of consumer products.

Sperling's BestPlaces has released a survey of 331 metro areas looking for the mosted stressful places to live in the United States... They looked at (amoung other things) suicide rates, unemployment, incidents of theft, gloomy weather, commute times, alcohol consumption and self-reported mental health...

For the 100 largest metro areas, the most stressful places to live:

• Tacoma, Washington
• Miami, Florida
• New Orleans, Louisiana
• Las Vegas, Nevada
• New York, New York
• Portland, Oregon (coincidentally the home of BestPlaces)
• Mobile, Alabama
• Stockton-Lodi, California
• Detroit, Michigan
• Dallas, Texas

And the least stressful was the Albany-Schenectady-Troy area of New York...

Of course, there are also the results for medium sized and small metro areas...

For the 114 mid-sized metro areas, the most stressful places to live:

• Galveston-Texas City, Texas
• Flint, Michigan
• Fort Pierce-Port St. Lucie, Florida
• Bremerton, Washington
• Beaumont-Port Arthur, Texas
• Lakeland-Winter Haven, Florida
• Daytona Beach, Florida
• Modesto, California
• Brazoria, Texas
• Shreveport-Bossier City, Louisiana

And the least stressful was the Provo-Orem area of Utah...

For the 117 smallest metro areas, the most stressful places to live:

• Yuba City, California
• Gadsden, Alabama
• Sherman-Denison, Texas
• Anniston, Alabama
• Pueblo, Colorado
• Jackson, Michigan
• Pine Bluff, Arizona
• Redding, California
• Kenosha, Wisconsin
• Danville, Virginia

And the least stressful was the Bismarck, North Dakota...

For the first time in more than 3 years, more Americans would rather reduce their debt than reduce their weight! A recent survey of New Year's resolutions by the Cambridge Consumer Credit Index found that 28% of consumers want to get out of debt while 27% say losing weight and exercising is their top goal of 2004... The survey also found that 15% want to get a more secure or better job, 13% want to improve their personal relationships, and 7% plan to reduce their drinking and smoking...

In a related survey, Cambridge Credit Counseling released the results of a monthly survey of people who have called in for credit counseling services: 33% said they are frustrated with high bank rates and fees, 7% said got into too much debt by overspending, and 8% said their lack of financial education caused them to take on too much debt...

Britain's Queen Elizabeth officially named the $800 million Cunard cruise ship the Queen Mary 2 today, saying "I name this ship Queen Mary 2. May God bless her and all who sail in her..."

The Queen Mary 2 (the QM2) replaces the Queen Elizabeth 2 (the QE2) for Atlantic crossings (Queen Elizabeth named the QE2 in 1967)... The Queen Mary 2 is 1138 feet (342 meters) long and 241 feet (72 meters) high - as tall as a 23-story building! Its 1,310 cabins, including four royal suites and six penthouses, can accommodate 2,620 passengers... The standard cabins are 194 square feet (58 square meters) and 955 of the cabins have balconies - fares begin at 2,449 pounds ($4,408) per person for 14 nights and rise to 26,839 pounds (U$48,310) (but the most expensive ones come with private butlers!)... Entertainment includes a theatre, a cinema that converts to a planetarium, a casino, five pools, an art gallery, 15 restaurants and bars, and even an education programme devised by Oxford University!

Some interesting facts:

• She is as long as 41 double decker buses
• Her whistle - taken from the first Queen Mary - will be audible for 10 miles
• There's almost one crew member (1253 total) for every two passengers
• A single joystick on the bridge manoeuvres her sideways
• Her plant power room could light the whole of Southampton
• In her 40-year lifetime (at 30 voyages a year) she will travel the equivalent of 12 times to the moon and back
• Her speed, 30 knots, is 2 knots slower than the QE2
• The Canyon Ranch spa is the biggest ever on a cruise ship

The 14-day - fully booked - maiden voyage from Southampton (the departure point for the Mayflower and the Titanic) to Fort Lauderdale is scheduled to begin Monday... Get more details at the Cunard web site...

Under a new law that took effect on January 1st, 2004, people in a movie theater may make citizen's arrests of people they see attempting to record the movie with a camcorder... The law carries a maximum penalty of 1 year in jail and a $2500 fine... The L.A. Police Department (always at the forefront of calm and violence-free arrests ) is offering to train movie theater employees in "detention and confrontation techniques..."

(Popcorn Selling Employee, "That will be $37 sir." Customer, "For a large popcorn and a drink?!?" Employee, "Yes sir." Customer, "That's outrageous!" Employee, "Is that a camcorder in your back pocket sir?" )

A 7-year-old Wisconsin boy outside a Piggly Wiggly near Sheboygan got bored while his father was on the pay phone... He did not get bored with the game machine with all the stuffed animals and the claw to grab them with... Unfortunately, he had no money... So he attempted to climb into the machine through the dispensing chute! And got stuck in the machine!!!

The fire department was called, but did not want to smash the machine with the boy inside... So they wheeled the machine around the back until a locksmith could be found... An hour later, the boy was released unharmed but desparately seeking a bathroom!

The robot rover Spirit made a successful landing in Gusev crater last night, the first craft to land without disaster on the red planet since 1997! It sent back its first confirmation within minutes - a quick tonal signal saying it was generally OK - and within hours had beamed back images from its new home... And this is just the beginning! Although it will take most of a week to fully "unpack" itself and move from it's landing platform to the Mars surface, once it gets on the ground, it will be able to cover 100 yards a day and its eight cameras will provide images and panoramas with resolutions so sharp they retain crisp detail when blown up to the size of a movie screen (according to NASA)... And if it finds something interesting, it's microscopes, spectrometers and drills can drill into rocks and collect samples that could unlock all sorts of geologic secrets...

So visit the Mars Exploration Rover Mission web site often to see what's new - every day will be an adventure!

(And don't forget Spirit's sister rover Opportunity that is set to land on the opposite side of Mars on January 24th!)

The boys and I were quite excited today... We went to our local 7-11 convenience store and were happily surprised to find two new flavors of Propel: Grape and Tropical Citrus!!!

For those not already familiar with Propel, it is made by the Gatorade Company and marketed as Fitness Water. And Propel is mostly (lightly) flavored water, but - like it's more sugary, heavier Gatorade ancestor - is enhanced with vitamins to help keep a body hydrated when out working in the yard, exercising, or playing sports... And the truth is on the label and in the taste... For an 8oz serving, there are only 10 calories, only 2g of sugars, but loads of B vitamins and such... And the taste is fantastic - not too heavy, not too sweet... My Dad was recommended Propel when he was diagnosed with diabetes, and he has since gotten the rest of us hooked on it...

So now there are two new flavors (both very good, by the way), so you can choose from Grape, Tropical Citrus, Lemon, Berry, Kiwi-Strawberry, Orange, Peach and Black Cherry... Try one instead of Gatorade or Powerade next time you go looking for a drink!

Shortly after 2:45 PM ET today, the NASA Stardust robotic craft passed within 240 kilometers (149 miles) for comet Wild-2 at a relative speed of 13,645 mph... In doing so, it managed to catch a tennis-racket-shaped catcher full of comet dust and then take dozens of black-and-white photographs of the comet nucleus... Although it will take an additional 744 days to return to Earth, if it succeeds, it will be the first time since 1976 that a robot has returned samples of non-terrestrial material to Earth! Be sure to visit the Stardust web site for the latest info and pictures of the comet!

Three questions for you, this New Year's Day... (1) Why is it that on New Year's Eve all the stores stay open normal hours (or late), even though that's the day everyone really wants to go out and party or celebrate? (2) Why, on New Year's Day, do all the stores open at their normal morning time (or early), even though everyone was up way late the night before celebrating? And (3) why do all the stores close early on New Year's Day, even though that's just when everyone is recovering from the night before and wanting to do stuff and there's really no good reason to close? This is a strange tradition for celebrating the New Year...